5 DBT Techniques to Ground Yourself When Caught in Emotional Spirals
As a therapist that incorporates DBT in my therapy, I often describe emotional dysregulation as a storm: sudden, powerful and difficult to navigate once it begins. Shame and guilt can be the hardest winds in that storm, knocking us further from our sense of safety and balance. Fortunately, the skills developed in Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) offer not just tools for regulation, but pathways back to the present moment.
DBT teaches that balance is possible even in distress when we learn how to anchor our attention, soothe the body and move gently toward acceptance. Below, I share 5 DBT-based techniques that support grounding when emotions feel too strong or spiral into painful self-judgment. Each section includes reflective prompts to help you connect these practices to your own experience.
1. Mindful Observation: Returning to the Present
When emotions escalate quickly, mindfulness offers a way to come back to what is real, right here and now. Mindful observation means noticing your sensations, thoughts and environment without judgment. It is not about fixing or analysing what you feel, it’s about naming what’s happening to regain perspective.
Try focusing on one sensory channel at a time:
- What can I see?
- What can I hear?
- What can I feel against my skin?
This gentle redirection stabilises awareness and allows the nervous system to slow down.
Reflective prompts:
When emotions rise, what do I notice first: my body, thoughts, or environment?
How can I use mindfulness to catch early signals of emotional escalation?
2. The STOP Skill: Interrupting Emotional Impulse
The STOP skill provides structure when emotion threatens to overtake reason. It stands for:
Stop: Pause your action.
Take a step back: Literally or mentally remove yourself from the situation.
Observe: Notice your internal experience: your heartbeat, your thoughts, the pull of your emotions (shame, abandonment, guilt, etc).
Proceed mindfully: Choose your next step with awareness instead of panic.
STOP helps you interrupt automatic responses that might deepen the spiral (such as self-criticism or withdrawal) and reintroduces choice into the moment.
Reflective prompts:
How does the pace of my thinking change when I pause with the STOP skill?
What does it feel like to choose a mindful response instead of a reactive one?
3. Self-Soothing Through the Senses
Strong feelings of shame or guilt often make the body tense and agitated. DBT’s self-soothing techniques use the five senses to create calm and connection. You might comfort yourself through scent (a candle), sound (a favourite song), touch (a warm blanket), taste (herbal tea), or sight (watching clouds move across the sky).
Grounding through the senses activates the parasympathetic nervous system, the body’s natural calm response, reminding you that safety can also be felt physically, not only thought about intellectually.
Reflective prompts:
Which of my senses helps me calm down most effectively?
How can I prepare a self-soothing kit for when I’m overwhelmed?
4. Opposite Action: Shifting Through Behaviour
When guilt or shame takes hold, it can cause withdrawal, avoidance, or rumination. DBT’s Opposite Action skill encourages you to identify the emotion’s urge and gently do the opposite. If shame urges you to hide, you might call a trusted friend. If guilt pushes you toward harsh self-criticism, you could name one thing you’ve handled with care recently.
The goal is not to suppress emotion but to shift its energy through action. Behaviour informs feeling, sometimes movement precedes emotional balance.
Reflective prompts:
What actions do I take when shame or guilt appears in my life?
What act of kindness toward myself could represent an opposite action?
5. Radical Acceptance: Softening Resistance
Radical acceptance is one of the most transformative DBT skills. It means fully acknowledging a difficult reality, whether that’s a painful memory, a regret, or a circumstance you wish were different. Acceptance isn’t approval or resignation, it’s a choice to stop fighting what already is. From that place of allowance, healing becomes possible.
Try reminding yourself: “This moment is painful and I can still meet it with understanding.” Notice how the resistance you feel begins to loosen when you allow things to just be for a moment.
Reflective prompts:
What am I resisting that I cannot change right now?
How does acceptance make space for compassion toward myself or others?
Integrating DBT Grounding into Daily Life
Grounding is not a one-time event, it’s a series of small, consistent choices that bring us home to the present when life feels chaotic. Try practicing one of these techniques each day, even when calm. Training your body and mind to respond mindfully strengthens emotional resilience when distress arises.
A Note on Therapy and Support
This information is shared for education and personal development. They are not a replacement for therapy or professional care. Many people discover through exploration that DBT may resonate more than other therapeutic modalities, while others find benefit in approaches like Schema Therapy, IFS, or EMDR. Every person’s path to healing is unique.
If you have questions about DBT or how to integrate these grounding skills into therapeutic work, reach out to Connecting Mental Health.
At Connecting Mental Health, we’re committed to providing expert support both in-person and online across Australia.
If you’re ready to take the next step in your healing journey, I invite you to browse and book a session with one of the experienced holistic mental health practitioners at Connecting Mental Health. We’re here to walk alongside you, every step of the way.
Contact us if you have any questions or feedback.
Article written by Jono Derkenne, Accredited Mental Health Social Worker